Whatever I choose, it doesn't feel right. Whatever I choose, it makes me feel tense and uncomfortable. Whatever I choose, you'll probably still get hurt.
While I am thankful that you shared about your own struggles with your opinionated yet sensitive personality, it puts a burden on me that I don't know how to deal with. Most times, I will bite my tongue. I'll avoid the discussions. I might inwardly roll eyes, but I will work really hard on my attitude. I'll respect your decisions, even when I find them frustrating. I'll let you think what you want to think about my opinions. I'll do my best not to hurt you.
But I'm scared of the other times. Because if I slip one time, I fear I'll really slip. I don't want to hurt you, but I'm scared that I might. I don't want to offend you, yet sometimes it's so hard. I fear the moment of the perfect storm. The moment when I feel like I can't just let you treat me this way. The moment when I feel like I can't just let your son act this way. The moment when I don't care that it will hurt you, because it seems like you need to be hurt to see what you are doing. That it doesn't matter how much thought you've put into every single decision, that it doesn't matter how right how think you are, something is wrong with this situation. And in that perfect storm, I might not bite my tongue.
I don't know whether to hope that moment will never come. Or to hope it will just come and we'll get it over with.
The biggest question, is whether we'd survive it.
I'm sad that this is the place we're in.
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