Stop Talking

Everyone should be quick to listen and slow to speak.  (James 1:19)

That needs to be my approach with her.  I need to take deep breaths.  Maybe wiggle my toes a few times.  As soon as I get my defensive guard up, I am on her level - a place I very much do not want to be.  I actually don't really need to care what her opinion is.  I don't even need to care what her opinion of my opinion is.  I don't even need to care that she has an opinion of my opinion.  I can not engage.  She can't do battle with someone who is unarmed.  If it was anyone else, I'd be so much better at this.

If I picture her saying something I find ridiculous, what's my response?  Deep breath.  Silence.  Listen.  Try to hear what is behind it.  The fear, the insecurity, the background of issues I know nothing about.  Be kind, for everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about.  Out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks.  So I will focus not on what the mouth speaks, but on what might be in the heart that makes the mouth say such things.  A little bit of empathy will go a long way.

But first I need to slow down.
Listen to the words.
Listen to the heart.
And most of all, stop talking.