Skimming the pages of my Bible that live in my memory, words like Full, Abundant, Overflowing, Surpassing, and Greater catch my eye as they fly past. They always have.
A lifetime ago, they compelled a spontaneous and instant response, my hands rocketing outwards to grab on to them and with me dragging along behind. I'd see my grip tighten and my knuckles whiten as I clung to their promise that this emptiness could be filled. The twin monsters of loneliness and unworthiness danced around mockingly, trying to swallow my heart whole with their lies. But hope clawed its way out of their jaws never letting go of its life-grip on those soaring, majestic assurances that one day.
Today my response is less urgent. Its subtleness startles me as I reread those same words and recognize that the longing has changed. I am not empty; I don't 'need' to be filled. My life is full of good things, precious people, valued gifts. My soul is filled with passions, dreams, and hopes. My days are filled with the glorious mundane that is sweeping up Cheerios into dustpans and children into my arms. My heart is full and overflowing.
He is full of grace and truth. Though the realization arrived more subtly, I slowly reach out and take hold of the words as they meander past. I don't have to grasp them so tightly this time. They comfortably melt into my warm palm. These are mine. I've known them for years. Their extravagance defines what I know of Him. Their hope and abundance describes what I desire for me. The tide is turning as I gently, repeatedly, cozily draw near to Him. He is here and one day I will be *full* of Him.
No comments:
Post a Comment