In the waiting, there are so many questions. I can list off the reasons why I know this is my calling. But the list of how's is even longer. How will Bernie and I ever be of one mind? How do I wait? How long will I have to wait? How will I know when it is time? How will it start? How should I approach it? How can I prepare? How will we afford it? How do I stay passionate for the long haul? How do I overcome the doubts? How do I cling to a vision that is not concrete?
Mary's words echo through my mind as I wait and wonder, "But how will this be?"
God of all passions, gifts, and dreams
God of my specific calling
Misunderstood God
God of Mystery
I don't want to question or doubt or undermine You
Lord I believe, help me overcome my unbelief
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