Voice (John 20:16)

Everything is moving
and loud and busy.
Can You be the One
to slow it down
or hold my hand
or whisper in my ear?
Just steady me
even if you can't ready me.
Catch my attention
with Your beauty
or Your grace
or Your love
or Your voice.
Say my name
and I will know
it is You.

Sigh (Psalm 38:9)

Boot-print-shaped sighs trudge through living room 

before sanity strikes and traipses back the long way again

Mud-caked truck treads roll over sighing carpet fibres 

who see another day of moderately effective scrubbing 

Trail of drips and drops lead mockingly 

to near-flooded grey-brown soupy sink 

that sighs as it tries to drain

Where their trying makes things messier

Or my trying makes things messier

Bible in hand, diapers checked along the way

almost to the window spot when I am caught

And I sigh

And He sees

Strengthen (Psalm 27:14)

In my ability to love
Lord, strengthen my heart
In my capacity for compassion
Lord, strengthen my heart
In my weakness of resolve
Lord, strengthen my heart
In my wandering whims
Lord, strengthen my heart
In my doubts and disasters
Lord, strengthen my heart
In my heav'n-turned glimpses
Lord, strengthen my heart
In my giddy thanksgiving
Lord, strengthen my heart
In Your grace and Your mercy
Lord, strengthen my heart

New Song (Psalm 144:9)

bow strange yet familiar in my hand
fingers fumble across strings
eyes dart back and forth to soak it all in
tracing overgrown paths from symbol to song
all is new again, these melodies I've heard before
how is it that so much time has passed
foolishness says it won't be done
but nervousness quickly gives way
only a few tries before I hear the song arise
from my heart-well of gifts and graces
You draw a new song, O Lord

Incense (Psalm 141:2)

slow-cooker boasts of homemade apple juice
warming slowly on the counter
one squeezed orange and a sprinkling of cinnamon
the scent of winter warmth and cozy nights
the most tantalizing of promises
delicious delicacies and comfortable company
desperate whispers, mindless songs
inward cries, upward sighs
each adding to the fragrance of His throne-room
pleas and praises mingling
my prayers rise like steam
intoxicating
He breathes me in
the aroma of longing
and of belonging

The One Whose Beauty Enraptures (Psalm 27:4)

The dark navy layers of clouds that act to accentuate the florescent pink of the setting sun

The lit-up face of the untempered, all-encompassing joy of a child

The untouched perfection of the snowy white mountainside 

The rays piercing through the hoarfrosted branches of winter

The song sung to Jesus with the raspy voice of innocence

The sweet smell of cinnamon on a lazy morning

The moments that capture goodness and beauty

I pause involuntarily to soak them in

Time slows and sounds fade

And everything becomes more significant than it is

The veil thins and things unseen are closer

For a moment I am enraptured

A reflex to knowing

Beyond a shadow of a doubt

That He is near

I see the beauty of the Unseen One

Stay

I just want to stay right here
Clinging to this thing I feel
Your love shines on my heav'n-turned face
My heart warms basking in Your grace
I'm all aglow and I have nowhere to go
I just want to stay right here
Clinging to this thing I -- CRASH

Glory of Leaves

The left-over summer green leaves the glowing golden-orange leaves the electric yellow leaves the fire-y red leaves the darkened purple leaves the daily changing leaves the crisp crunchy leaves the wind-blown rustling leaves the bright blue backdrop to the leaves the sun shining through the leaves the soon-to-be-jumped-in leaves proclaim the glory of the Lord
The God of all nature
Creator of Beauty
Master Craftsman
Who made everything glorious

Learning Beauty

Rhythmic falling of runners on pavement
rain falling stunningly fragrant
Despite the desired perfection of the connection
between my reflection and my soul direction
lies call out, unrelenting in their misrepresenting

Go for a run, they holler smugly
or you'll gain a tonne, Big and Ugly.
The standard's way above you;
reach it now or he won't love you.
It's a pity you're not itty-bitty
or you'd have a chance at being pretty
My hunch is your lack of crunches will only add uns to your uns.
Undesirable
Unadmirable
Unlovable in my head
Untouchable in my bed
Unenduring in youth
Unalluring in truth
You need to earn beauty, say the mean voices
But I know there must be umpteen choices

It starts out gentle, this mental battle
cloaked in truths, it is still a judgmental sentiment
and detrimental to my fundamental elements

By now my ritual is habitual
and my rebuttal anything but subtle.
He says I am altogether perfect in form
I know He speaks truth and that you're misinformed
He says I am beautiful and He made me so
I try to be dutiful and let these words grow
Day in and day out I choose them to be true
since I'm only me and You, well, You're You

You need to earn beauty, say the loud voices
turns out you need to learn beauty
and my soul rejoices

Creator of the New Me

God you are the Creator of me
and the Creator of the new me
the one I don't always recognize
but really quite like
The new me created with new capacities
for righteousness
for holiness
for godliness
not because I'm trying harder
but because you made it that way
Thank you for making me who I am in the first place
and thank you for the soul-overhaul that screams of you
That gives fire to my passions
success to my abilities
direction to my desires
meaning to my moments
Your love
in all its height and width and depth
breathed creative life into me
on the day of my salvation
And on every day of insight
my faith grows higher and wider and deeper
All praise and glory and honour and thanks
To you
the Creator of this new me

He says of My Body

Bits of yourself you don't really like
Each declared
Altogether beautiful, my darling
Understand this
There is no flaw in you
I knit you together
Feel the truth of my words
Upon you I have breathed 'good'
Let yourself trust my highest opinion of you

Origin of Words

uncontainable

bubbling over, eruption

bursting at the seams, stuffed to the gills

crammed brimming, filled and spilling

saturating its surroundings 

with goodness and grace

drowning its domain

with anger and rage

restorative

devastating

far-reaching either way

out of the overflow

of the mouth

the heart speaks

Running

ready to go, as always
same black shorts, same orange hat
start slow, warm up
blood flowing, heart pumping
breathing's steady, here we go
choose a song, pick up the pace
run from my troubles, run from myself
don't think, just push harder
turn the corner, head north
avoid puddles, duckin' and dodgin'
nod to cyclist, cringe at cool breeze
stitch in side, careful breaths
knees jarring, first third
now to the east, speed up again
enjoy the sun, it's just getting good
deeper breaths, longer strides
zone out, forget for a bit
1 2, left right
getting tired, losing steam
don't give up, don't slow down
must be faster, must be fitter
pushing through, marking steps
round the bend, to the south
back in the shade, past halfway
redouble efforts, find a good song
energy building, pain subsiding
hitting my stride, feeling good
sweating, smiling
I got this, last turn
west again, home stretch
kids waiting, supper time
a bit of wind, legs burning
so tired, going to make it
one more song, just keep on
out of breath, final push
stop the timer, home

Prayer

I don't have any time.

                  Any time you seek Me, I am here, My child.

Today you feel far from me.

                            From Me you receive blessing after blessing.

I don't know that I will be forgiven.

                                        Forgiven happened at the cross, beloved.

I don't know the right words.

                                 Word became flesh and made His dwelling among you.  

My heart is not in a good place.

                           A good place to begin, dearest, is to lift your eyes up.

The needs are so great and numerous.

                       So great and numerous are My splendid works.

First I will try it my way.

                        My ways are not your ways, little one.

I am not worthy to come before you.

                                      Before you loved Me, I loved you.
I don't feel like it today.
                          Today if you hear My voice, do not harden your hearts.