Grief

It sweeps over me in the oddest of places and I wonder what they think of the lady with the stroller, crying in the line for pancakes.  It's awkward and inconsiderate in its timing and refuses to be contained to the corners of my day and my life in which is would be more appropriate or at least less inconvenient.  But please don't try to take this grief from me.  Sure, it hinders my joy.  Certainly, it dampens my carefree spirit.  But, oh, does it shield me from arrogance and ignorance!  It shapes my words with gentleness and opens my eyes with empathy.  It makes my soul bleed compassion and acceptance.  I know it makes you uncomfortable that I can't talk about this without tearing up, but please please don't take this grief from me.  It is what I need to be what she needs.