You know (Psalm 139:1)

You have searched me and you know me, O Lord.
You know my exhaustion and my exasperation.
You know my tired eyes and tired sighs.
You know my doubts and dread, my full and weary head.
You know my facade and you know where it is flawed.
You know that I bellow, holler, and yell.
You know that I don't want to build another fort
and you know that my fuse is oh-so-short.
You know my wit's end and the time I spend in this hell-ish trend.
You know what is only mine to know.
But you know.

And oh, how you love me so.

Lord, when I am so helpless and weak, sing Your song of delight over my soul so that I too could know.  That I could know the depths of Your unconditional love in the depths of my desperate soul.  That the glorious riches of Your greater grace could be the melody of Your song that is with me when I awake.

Don't look, Lord, this is too gross and messy and embarrassing.
I don't want You to know that's what I'm like.

But I extend grace.

But not for this, Jesus.  Not this time.  It's too much.  It's too awful.

But that is what grace is for.

But I'm not even asking for it.  I don't want to put words
to what I've done, to who I am.

But my grace surpasses.

But it's going to happen again, the same mistakes over and over.

I am so sorry.

But I give greater grace.

Greater?

Greater than you could earn.

Greater than you could repay.

Greater than you deserve.

Greater than your struggles.

Greater than your pain.

Greater than you could comprehend.

Surpassing, increasing, abounding, overflowing.

But I give greater grace.

My deep, dark corners where I keep the things that no one should see are not too deep and not too dark for you.  

Pondering 'greater'

The one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.
from 1 John 4:4
The Lord is greater than all other gods
from Exodus 18:11
for there is a greater power with us than with him
2 Chronicles 32:7
for God is greater than any mortal
from Job 33:12
I know that the Lord is great, that our Lord is greater than all gods.
Psalm 135:5
You will see greater things than that.
from John 1:50
He must become greater, I must become less.
John 3:30
My father...is greater than all
from John 10:29
they will do even greater things than these
from John 14:12
Greater love has one man than this; that he lay down his life for his friend's.
John 15:13
We know that God is greater than our hearts
from 1 John 3:20
But He gives greater grace
from James 4:6