Does the alarm wake her from an exhausted, fitful sleep or was she up all night worrying and working through scenario after scenario in which she has no say?
Does the water of the shower washing over her shoulders do anything to ease the anger at those who have taken her baby away? Or does it multiply the tears of anguish as she looks back and wonders how her life has come to this?
What does she make herself for breakfast on the day she fights to get you back - and can she even eat a bite of it?
What shoes does she choose to walk up the steps and stand in front of the one who will decide whether she is fit to parent or not?
Does she get to court an hour early to make sure she doesn't miss one single moment or does she slip in just before the buzzer to avoid an extra second of scrutiny?
Does someone walk with her and hold her hand in support or does she bravely go it alone? Does she have your picture in her wallet, on her phone, in her mind?
Has she bought you an adorable, cozy blanket, in hopes that you will come home with her? Are there toys and stuffed animals waiting in a box that she can't bear to open yet?
Does she think back to the moment she first held you? Pink, wet, new, perfect? Can she cling also to the smiles and cuddles of the last months, even if they were all contained to a few hours per week within the same four walls?
Does she cry in front of everyone or wait until she's alone?
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